Brewers Code

A couple of Saurdays a month, I work at Pedernales Brewing Company's room. This Saturday, a group of homebrewers came in.

I used to think home brewers were cool. Now I realize we're dicks.

The brewer at PBC calls Lobo Negro a Dunkel. A home brewer explained at great length that dunkels shouldn't have any roast flavor. The implication is that I am misinforming people about the beer. Schwartzbiers can have a roast flavor, he explained. Then he shrugged his shoulders and asked for another.

A bit later, the same dude came back for Lobo Texas Lager. The brewer calls in a Pre-Prohibition pilsner. Dude spends several minutes lecturing me on Classic American Pilsner, and about how there's corn in it, and PBC shouldn't say this is a Pre-Pro Pilsner because there's no corn in it.

There's no reason to lecture the servers at a brewery tour about beer styles.  They aren't brewers. The brewer has gone home for the day. You wanna bitch about how they describe their beers? Email the brewer and let HIM/HER know why the descriptions are wrong. Don't lecture me.

Don't be a dick.

If you have to spend ten minutes explaining to the server how the beer is misnamed and not to style, perhaps you should OPEN YOUR OWN FUCKING BREWERY!

The Brewing Network formulated a Brewers Code in 2006. Essentially it boiled down to "Don't Be A Dick." Wil Wheaton popularized that message a year later in regards to gaming. Now it's known as Wheaton's Law.

If you are taking a brewery tour, please don't be a dick. The other people on the tour don't give a fuck about beer styles, what the mash temperatures are, why the brewer choose those hops, and why didn't he mash at another temperature, based on the BJCP guidelines. You are only making yourself look like a douche. and pissing off everyone around you.

Don't be a dick.

From my Memoirs

As I was gathering my notes from NHC and putting into something of a publishable form, I recounted my experience at Pro Night. In my notes was something that has bothered me about every beer festival, so I thought I would post it here and then ask for some input.

All 1300 attendees were standing five deep at the tables around the ball room where the beer was. We made a circle around the inner perimeter, fought our way to the front of a couple of lines, then said, “Fuck it!” and retired to our room.

At this juncture, allow me to propose a rule of ettiquette when you attend a beer festival: STEP AWAY FROM THE FUCKING BAR!!

Remember there are people behind you. After you get your beer, if you must ask questions, make them short and sweet. For example, “This is a nice beer. Would you consider helping brew something like it? May I email you?” Get the card then STEP AWAY FROM THE FUCKING BAR!

And don't simply turn and take a step to talk to your friends, who have formed a large circle in front of the table. We're not attackers. You don't have to circle the wagons to defend the jockey box. Take ten steps from the bar so other people can have some beer. We will leave you some. Just STEP AWAY FROM THE FUCKING BAR!

What would you add to a Beer Festival Etiquette list? Post your thoughts in the comments.